Yoohh, guys…no. Just no. This whole ohh, ‘he took my virginity’ ‘oh, I gave you my virginity’ blah, blah, blah…I just don’t get it. It’s not like I do not understand why having a sexual relation with someone for the first time might be a big deal, for some…but girls, ladies…come on. Virginity, precious or not, is not a commodity okay! It’s not a physical object that can be properly wrapped in some nice expensive glittery gift wrapper and handed out to that special someone like some Santa gift. It’s not some several carat diamond that can be taken away by some rogue or whatever. Noooooooo. It’s not. It is basically a state of not having experienced a sexual encounter with anyone before. It’s more a state of mind. It’s not some thick hymen membrane tissues in your vagina. Noooo. These tissues can break from the somersaults you used to do when five, or from your bike riding adventures. It’s not a state of ‘purity’ as most claim, trust me, by the time one is twelve, they have seen waaaaay more despicable things for them to no longer be considered pure. Virginity is a construct eh!! Are we together. It is a construct by our various societies. Some societies are stricter on enhancing this construct and norm than others are. But what is common in all societies is that, a female’s expectations and perceptions of virginity are raised a tad higher than those of their male counter parts.
This is why, today, a girl posted a heartfelt story of how she ‘gave’ her virginity to this guy who later treats her as ‘trash’.
. Am like nooooooo, young girl, just stop it,noooo….quit that. Stop beating yourself up for someone being a jerk. Stop beating yourself up for experiencing a perfectly normal life cycle. Stop beating yourself up for deciding to engage in mutually consented intercourse. Just stop it. Stop using the ‘he took my virginity’ line to throw a self-pity party. Just stop it. Stop letting the construction of others concept of sexuality press you down. Stop it. Arret ça s’il te plait hein!!
Women, enjoy sex. Yeasss… enjoy the hell out of it. ‘But ohhh, Zippy, how dare you say that out loud? How dare you promote ‘moral decadence’?’ You wanna know how I dare to do that…I dare to do that because I dare to challenge all of us to take charge of ourselves, I challenge us all to take the reins of our bodies. Let’s run our bodies ehh…why the fuck should we be giving the wheels to the society to dictate and run our lives for us??? Irony how, we will be told, ‘Just be yourself’, ‘Just live your life’, ‘Don’t mind what people say’ but in issues such as sexuality, do the same phrases apply? Let me rephrase that question, in the cases of FEMALE sexuality, do the same sentiments hold water?
Can a young girl be made to understand that having her first sexual encounter does not in any way involve her giving her power away to that specific male? Can she be let to comprehend that anytime she engages in the act she is meant to have as much satisfaction as her fellow partner? Can it be made clear to her that the fact that she might like sex and enjoy it a looooot doesn’t put the label slut on her forehead…oh, btw, the same word sounds quite off when used to refer to an individual from the male kingdom.
Most people now will claim to be pro women empowerment, but will still be the first to throw a stone at a young lass who has an ‘earlier than usual’ first sexual experience. They’ll still cringe whenever they have to talk about the sex topic to younger sisters. Hell, they might even be cringing now while reading this. But hey, regardless of one’s religion, personal beliefs etc, we should all agree that matters of where one sticks their organs or what one let’s get stuck in them is a veeeeery personal matter, and as such, makes it none of our businesses, making it not up to us to judge who’s prudish or not, who’s whorish or not, blah…blah… But all in all, let’s let those who love the act enjoy it in peace eh!! Let’s empower our girls on the same, Let’s try and recreate the whole conception of the matter. Make them understand that having sex with a guy doesn’t make him have power/ control over them at all. Make them embrace and even nurture their sexuality and sensual feelings.
P/S; I am not encouraging reckless sexual behaviour, not at all. I am pro sexual liberty for all, taking into account that morality is relative, what is right in a given society may be wrong in another.