I finally got it,

I finally got that heart pain that is always sang about in those painful sad heart break songs.

How does it feel, well; let me try as much as my limited descriptive vocabulary allows to explain it.

Its like a sting, a persistent sting in your chest and upper abdomen, then its like it moves over to the left part of your chest (where the heart is) and up through your oesophagus; then, just when you think its finally gonna come out through the mouth, it gets stuck. And the whole process goes on over and over again. Its real folks, the pain is real; it hurts so bad. Alafu, the lower abdomen feels like you just received a blow in the guts, like there’s a tied knot over there.

Your heart beats so low you can barely even feel it; which makes you wonder whether you’ll survive this. Your legs, they feel so weak; standing up needs supporting; they feel mushy in fact, like jelly.

The Science behind it all;

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/what-causes-chest-pains/

 

It hurts.

And the climax; is when the eyes join in the melancholy. Now the knot in the throat turns into sniffles. Tears flow drop after drop. You let them, the energy to wipe them is lacking.

Your mind is in a haze.

How did it happen? Yesterday, we were on top of the world; and of each other. Then today, boom!! We turn to strangers. How? What went wrong within the 9hours of separation? How did all the days we spent together turn to nil significance? How did all our experiences turn forgettable?

Well, you guessed right.

The questions remain a rhetoric as your brain functions not at this moment.

So instead of wearing yourself out with all the unending questions, you turn and look through the window; your gruesomely dirty panes.

And right there, right there you find some solace.

In the grey dark clouds

In the white and black French roof tops

In the cold freezing -1°c breeze

You find solace

As it feels as though mother nature understands your pain

Feels like the weather has chosen to keep you company through it all today

And the Birdy + Rhodes playing in the background encourages the river of tears

And all you hope is that this river of tears washes the pain away